I am eagerly waiting for you to send me hate-mail. Please direct the pleasantries to: me@yo-momma.com. Thank you for your consideration, in advance.
This post is bizarre. Its about many bizarre discoveries…
Generally speaking, I can attribute these discoveries to @OmarWaraich.
How?
Well firstoff, a Disclaimer:- I don’t Know Omar Waraich personally and he did not intentionally lead or influence me towards these discoveries. However, his choice of display picture on Twitter had some … *how do i put this* … unintended consequences…?
Before I proceed with my spiel, courtesy makes it necessary to send out an apology to Omar for using his dp without his consent.
So … I recently joined twitter. I found OmarWaraich as a source of very informative tweets and re-tweets about Pakistan. He covers and reports on Pakistan for Time Magazine (http://bit.ly/gvDENt).
Omars display picture on twitter is …
This picture is so bad-ass that it makes the Marlboro-man look like a 49 years old virgin on a pony. The bad-ass-ness of this picture reminded me of similar bad-ass-ness exhibited by the Chief Minister of Punjab while posing for Banners for the 2008 Elections…
I am referring to the bad-ness-ness manifested by the frivolous use of the right hand. I fully understand that this is a value judgement on my part. After all, Omar would contend that the hand’s purpose is to ensure the cigarette has an appropriate resting place within the frame of the picture. And similarly Chotay Mian (Sa’ab) could justify the hand as being a pivotal portion of his extended face.
My first instinct was to tweet to @Omarwaraich that his DP is ‘bad-ass-ness personified’ and that it reminded me of Chotay-Mian (sa’ab). I anticipated Omar to respond with a request to rationalize my claim and this anticipation is what led to the REAL discovery…
I searched for “Shahbaz Sharif” on Google Images so that I could send a link of the above picture to Omar Waraich. Searching for the picture I stumbled upon a website known as http://www.pmln.com.pk which, apparently, is operated by this guy…
After some research, I discovered that this is NOT the official website of PML-N.Rather, its owned and operated by the dude above who is from Pir Mahal, a town near Faisalabad. He is the President of the PML-N Youth Wing for Pir Mahal.
But that fact does not discount the absurdity and bizarreness of this website and does not make it seem any less like ‘The Official PML-N website’ …
One is greeted to the website with the following banner…
I am not sure which kind of irony is more obvious/appropriate in/for the above banner… dramatic, Socratic or just plain comic irony?
What Iqbal was to Jinnah is pretty simple. If Iqbal was the thought; Jinnah was the action.
The metaphor and symbolism doesn’t quite stay true for the Mian-bradarayn (brothers). To compare Shahbaz with Iqbal and Nawaz with Jinnah is NOT naivete. Its Criminal! And such an act should be made part of the hudood ordinance and a chargeable/blasphemous offence under Pakistan Penal Code!
Khair, coming back to the bad-ass-ness; I don’t know if the culprit behind Omar Waraich’s bad-ass-ness is Omar himself but in case of Chotay Mian (sa’ab) the credit maybe attributable to this guy …
Muhammad Amir Khan (sa’ab, of course), the Chief Photographer to The Chief Minister Punjab.
Excuse you?
Yes, Thats right. You read it right… Amir Khan is not a Deputy Chief Photographer or the Deputy to the Chief Photographer, he is, in fact, the CHIEF Photographer for the ever-so-esthetically-appealing Chotay Mian (Sa’ab).
Speaking of Chotay Mian’s (and Motay Mian sa’ab)’s esthetics … These guys sure have a healthy enough sense of self-image and self-esteem to keep a photography team worthy of being managed by a Chief of Staff!
One would imagine they suffered from self-image issues that are usually experienced by teenaged girls – after all, the hair transplants can only be perceived as a solution to a problem!
But then Perceptions are not necessarily equal to reality. In fact they rarely are. So, I could be wrong about my perception of the body/self image issues of the Mian Bradaryn (brothers) … You know what… actually, I AM wrong about the Mian sa’abs. And I confess to being wrong because what kind of complexed individual with self-esteem issues would ever have a page dedicated to large posters and full-page sized cut-outs of himself!?!
That was a rhetorical Question … but if you insist, the answer is: not a complexed person!
Going with that logic, the following page vindicates the Mian bradarayn of any cognitive behavorial issues….
Confidence is the direct consequence of courage. I am coming to realize that this post has become more about Courage than anything else. After all a political party that has a Tiger as its mascot is obviously alluding to courage with symbolism!
What is courage? Courage, in layman terms, is ‘doing the right thing’. And clearly, Chotay Mian (sa’ab) has been doing the right thing. I mean, One is not bestowed upon with a rehmat like Hamza Shahbaz without doing the right things (wink wink).
If the above mentioned page vindicates Mian Nawaz Sharif of self-esteem issues, then the birth of Hamza Shahbaz (and his evolutionary journey to being who he is), vouches for Chotay Mian’s (sa’ab) courage(and confidence).
These priceless characteristics run through the Sharif family. Its got to be genetics! If anyone was to tell me that the family lacked either courage or confidence. I’d personally castrate that individual!
Preposterous?
Allow me to explain my claim … Remember those pin-up girls from Sport Illustrated Magazine’s Calender and those pin-up men from Fire-fighters’ Calenders?
These are calenders with sexually suggestive nature. They are not really instruments designed JUST to keep track of the day, date and month, as you might have already guessed.
These Calenders are produced as a response to a demand. (Unfortunately for them) A lot of guys and girls can only ‘get it ouun’ from these calendars.
Guess what, it turns out that the same kinds of needs or desires or problems are exhibited by the Jiyala class (political worker or party patron) of PML-N. The leadership knows of this quagmire too well and displaying the trademark courage and confidence Hamza Shahbaz took this task as a personal goal.
The goal was to ensure that the Jiyala class is fully satisfied. How did he do it? Check it out here …
No person with a deficiency of the righteous traits of courage and confidence would be able to feature in such a Calendar. This, in fact, is not a calender. Remember, these kinds of publications are not to keep track of the day, date and month. These have ulterior motives. The motif in this context was to ‘satisfy’ a demand of the PML-N Jiyalas and to display confidence by way of courage! I don’t know much, but I know this is a job done great on Hamza’s part!
Verily without such an endowment the PML-N working class(jiyala) would be terribly frustrated. And to subject oneself to being an object of pleasure for others is truly confident, courageous and bizarre all at the same time.
These are just a few of the fantastic findings from http://www.pmln.com.pk. Its truly bizarre how a random search for an image led me to such a treasure trove of awesomeness.
Ps. Thank you Omar Waraich!
jaleibi @ 